Lady Midnight (The Dark Artifices, #1) (2025)

Everyone knows that 4 is the perfect amount of reads, so don't judge me. Or was it 5? Maybe just to be sure I'll reread for the fifth time sometime :)
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Now I want to watch Notting Hill šŸ˜‚
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Iā€¦
*Breaths in*
donā€™tā€¦
*Breaths out*
knowā€¦
*Breaths in*
whatā€™sā€¦
*Breaths out*
happeningā€¦
*Breaths in*

Why am I so emotionally drained?
Why am I so emotionally invested in these characters?
Why do I feel so sad that they do not exist? And why do I want to cry because of that? And why had I cried because of that? And why, just why do they not exist?

I donā€™t know whatā€™s happening to me ā˜¹ I really don't know and so Iā€™m going to reread just one day after I finished.
---
The reread is done and I understand more and less at the same time.

Itā€™s so confusing that I love this book and there are things I donā€™t want to love, things that honestly Iā€™m kind of scared to be liking, things like the love triangle and the ā€œlowkeyā€ cheating. Thereā€™s always some of that in Cassandraā€™s books and itā€™s something that always bothered me but not in this book, I donā€™t think Iā€™d go as far as saying I enjoyed them but I didnā€™t mind them as much as I did before, I loved the characters too much to hate them for that, Is that a bad thing? That I love these characters so much Iā€™m ready to ignore something I believe to be wrong.

The other thing is the romance, this may not be as big of an issue as the love triangle and the cheating, maybe some of you will see it as no issue at all, but for someone like me who always saw it as a secondary thing, the plot first romance second, itā€™s weird to fall for this book, it is weird to daydream about it and it is weird to feel so muchā€¦ *sigh*.

I never mind the romance, I enjoy it but I donā€™t see it as the driving force for a book, or at least I thought so, now Iā€™m not sure. I used to skip such scenes, blushing and mortified that maybe someone noticed what I just read even when I completely alone šŸ˜‚. And now after reading this and rereading it, I love it? Iā€™m not sure, as I said Iā€™m so confused. Iā€™m not saying itā€™s not okay to love it, I just donā€™t understand why this book of all made me feel this way? Why do Iā€¦ *sigh again*

Thereā€™s a knot over my chest and I donā€™t know how to get rid of it and I think Iā€™m slumping.

I donā€™t think this is the kind of reviews you guys signed up for, Iā€™m sorry Iā€™m not sure how to go on about it honestly.

I think there are 3 questions that need answering about this book for you to know my experience reading this book and Iā€™ll try and answer them.
What did you love about this book?
What did you hate about this book?
What did you find unique about this book?

What do you love about this book?
Two characters. While I do love all the character in various degrees, these two are love and joy and life, they are heartbreak and tears and death. They are my heart.

Octavian Blackthorn

ā€œTavvy was standing by a whiteboard with a blue dry-erase marker, making possibly helpful notations, if they could ever be translated out of seven-year-old.ā€

You canā€™t hate Tavvy, you just canā€™t.
There are no words in this world to tell you how I feel about him, at least not words that I know of. This is terrible because I want to say so much about him but I donā€™t know how, so here are almost all of Tavvyā€™s scenes in the book, there are no spoilers but I tagged them just in case you wanted to know him reading the book.

-Beside them was Drusilla, holding the hand of the youngest, Tavvy. He looked asleep on his feet, his curly head against Druā€™s arm, his eyes closed.

-ā€œDru told me that faeries steal your teeth while youā€™re sleeping,ā€ Tavvy said.

- Tavvy had woken up and was wandering around sleepily, tugging on peopleā€™s sleeves. Emma ruffled his hair.

-Tavvy had curled up on the floor and was asleep in the angled beam of light from a lamp, exactly like a cat.

-ā€œTavvy!ā€ Julian said. ā€œDonā€™t run with lollipops in your mouth. You could choke.ā€
Tavvy removed the lollipop and stared at it the way someone might stare at a loaded gun. ā€œAnd die?ā€
ā€œHideously,ā€ Julian said. ā€œFatally, fatally die.ā€

-ā€œHow many have died, exactly? People and faeries?ā€
ā€œTwelve,ā€ said Emma. ā€œTwelve dead bodies.ā€
Tavvy emerged from under the table. ā€œWere they all running with lollipops?ā€

-Tavvy was standing by a whiteboard with a blue dry-erase marker, making possibly helpful notations, if they could ever be translated out of seven-year-old.

-ā€œOso.ā€ Tavvy took the bear and smiled a gap-toothed smile

-Tavvy was a curled-up ball under the covers of his bed. He was asleep, his body curved around one of his pillows, his mouth open on a gasp. Tears ran down his face.

-A massive bag of powdered sugar had been torn open and Tavvy was sitting inside it, completely covered in white powder. He looked like a tiny abominable snowman.

-Julian felt a pang for his smallest brother, so often trapped in rooms full of older people talking about blood and death.

-ā€œBecause itā€™s a childrenā€™s book,ā€ said Emma. ā€œIt wouldnā€™t have been in the library.ā€
ā€œThatā€™s dumb,ā€ said Tavvy serenely. ā€œItā€™s a good book.ā€

-Livvy gave a little gasp, reaching for the book. Hesitantly, Tavvy let her have it.
ā€œDonā€™t tear the pages,ā€ he warned.

-All she could see was Tavvy, little Tavvy, the smallest Blackthorn. Tavvy having nightmares, Tavvy in her arms as she carried him through the war-torn Institute five years ago. Tavvy covered in paint in Julesā€™s studio. Tavvy, who alone among them had skin that could not hold a single protection rune. Tavvy, who would not understand what was happening to him or why.

Julian Blackthorn
Every time his uncle calls him Andrew my heart shatters.

I have a place I go to, a special place, itā€™s not a secret or a hidden place but I think of it as my place, I go to it when I need to think, when I need to make sense of things, I go to it almost every day, not because I need to make sense of things every day but because itā€™s a common place, it only becomes special when I need it to be. I guess itā€™s not a special place exactly but a place for special things, itā€™s a place only made special by me and the thoughts I have while Iā€™m in there.

I shared my place with only two book characters, only two characters made me want to spend an afternoon, just me alone with my thoughts, just me alone with them, thinking.
Only two book characters made me love them so much I hated them for being fictional.
Julian Blackthorn is one of them.

Julian is whom I wish to be, I relate to him in some ways and that was more than enough for me. I want him to be happy, I want him to be hugged and be told that heā€™s loved, I want him to see himself as I see him. He makes me want to be better, he cares for his family, heā€™ll do anything for them and expects nothing in return.
Julian is the guardian angel for the people he loves, and his love for them makes him go out of his way, heā€™ll do wrong things to keep this family together and you can tell he hates it because heā€™s just the purest soul.

I donā€™t know if Iā€™m lucky or not, if you ever felt what Iā€™m feeling you know what Iā€™m talking about. Have you ever loved a character so much, in one hand youā€™re happy that you know them and in the other hand what does your life mean if you canā€™t protect them? if you can only wait to see what happens to them and you canā€™t do anything about it, what's the point if you're going to be absolutely helpless?

Maybe Iā€™m just being overdramatic and I wonā€™t feel the same tomorrow but I donā€™t want to read anything now, not that I can anyway.

What did you hate about this book?
Mark

Okay so this is what I wrote about Mark while I was reading, itā€™s unedited and I should say that Mark made me feel more confusion than hate, I think this shows as you read these unedited notes.

Mark is what I hate about this book heā€™s generally what I hate about most of Casandra Clareā€™s books.
He is all over the place with his feelings and I hate it when a characterā€™s feelings for another comes before his family and unfortunately that is Mark.

I feel sorry for what he has been through but he blames Julian for not trying to find him , Julian was 12. And no one, NO ONE has the right to say anything to Julian.

ā€œHe seemed like someone who had woken up after a hundred years of sleep, shaking the dust of a centuryā€™s dreams from his feet. He had been terrified...ā€

Mark has suffered, heā€™s hurt body and soul and I hate what happened to him, he makes me so confused, I donā€™t want to hate him but.
Granted this is not a perfect situation but everyone seems to be trying except him.

ā€œI am Julianā€™s parabatai,ā€ she said. ā€œAnd Julian needs you to stay.ā€
ā€œJulian is strong,ā€ he said.
ā€œJulian is strong,ā€ she agreed. ā€œBut you are his brother. And if you goā€”I donā€™t know if I can pick up those pieces.ā€
His eyes flicked back to her closet. ā€œWe survive losses,ā€ he whispered.

We do survive but that doesnā€™t mean we should inflict them voluntarily on the ones we love, and Julian already lost way too much, why is he the only one that needs to survive the losses while everyone else finds their escape.

Where the plot is going.

This is more of a guess but the way Iā€™m seeing the story is going is not something I like then again what do I know, I thought I wonā€™t like this and look at me now.
The way I see the story is Julian having to make hard choices between Emma and his family, I donā€™t like that, itā€™s what I hate about most characters, that they sacrifice their family for the one they love, not only do I hate it but also I donā€™t see Julian doing that and if he does Iā€™d be so disappointed, itā€™ll make all the feels he had for his siblings seem fake and that will break my heart.

And the love shapes, I always hate those and it seems there are going to be more of those.

I have to say though that both of those problems didnā€™t bother me much as I fell head over heels for the characters.
Also I think I hated perfect Diego but I havenā€™t seen much of him to be sure.

Also why is there no female characters like Julian or Jem from TID? I always like the male characters in these books more, if there was a female Julian, my life would be perfect.

What did you find unique about this book?
Unique doesnā€™t necessarily mean good.

This book took me by surprise, I didnā€™t expect at all to fall in love with it this much probably because of the previous experiences with Shadowhunters, so my expectations werenā€™t high but to feel this much for a book you thought so little of, itā€™s overwhelming.

How I didnā€™t mind the plot

Let me be honest for a second here, Cassandra Clareā€™s book are less about the fantasy element and more about YA and thatā€™s not a bad thing except that I always go into them with a fantasy mindset, that makes me focus on the plot and less about the other things and when the plot becomes predictable I lose interest but that didnā€™t happen with this one, this book actually restored my faith in contemporaries, recently I wasnā€™t in the mood for them but now I want them more and I love it more for that.

I just love some characters beyond what I thought possible, that made me ignore a lot of things just the happiness of my beloved characters, thatā€™s all I wanted.

How I loved the romance.

As I said in the beginning, I love the romance in this book, I donā€™t know how to approach this and I'm blushing just thinking about it so umm I'll leave it at that.

How much I cried

Itā€™s not that much but it happened more than I expected and this isnā€™t the most heartbreaking book ever. I donā€™t know why exactly this happened and I asked myself that so many times, at one point I believed something is wrong with me.

Other things
Here are things that added to the entire experience.

Emma

Emma is ruthless, she doesnā€™t go in roundabout ways, sheā€™s a straightforward rip off the band-aid kind of girl.

ā€œHalf the scars Emma had on her body sheā€™d put there herself, teaching herself to fall from the highest rafters, training herself to fight through pain by practicing barefootā€”on broken glass.ā€

ā€œThis is about me, not you,ā€ she said into the phone. Cristina gave her an encouraging thumbs-up. ā€œI am sick of you.ā€ She smiled brightly as Cristina dropped her face into her hands. ā€œSo maybe we could go back to being friends?ā€
There was a click as he hung up.

That was funny, I laughed at that until Christina pointed out that in two months Emma forgot three dates with him, skipped his birthday and dumped him because it was a slow patrol night.
This what makes me conflicted about her, sheā€™s strong and can do what others canā€™t but she can be cruel and harsh too.

She loves her best friend Cristina.

Sheā€™s rebellious and hates some of the laws the Clave made and when those laws stand on her way to discover what happened to her parents she doesnā€™t hesitate to break them. That makes me excited to see what sheā€™ll do when the laws stand between her and love.

Cristina

She has a past and sheā€™s trying to forget it.

As Emma said about her ā€œā€¦ sheā€™d always had the air of someone running from something.ā€

She loves Emma, I think they even couldā€™ve been parabatai if Emma wasnā€™t with Julian.

She brushed her hands through Emmaā€™s hair, looking at her worriedly. ā€œYou sure youā€™re not hurt?ā€
ā€œJulianā€™s blood,ā€ Emma whispered, and Cristina made a murmuring noise and pulled Emma into a hug. She patted Emmaā€™s back and Emma hung on to her for dear life and decided there and then that if anyone ever tried to hurt Cristina she would grind them to a pulp and make amusing sand castles out of the remains.

Dru

ā€œDru loves horror movies,ā€ said Emma. ā€œAnything with the word ā€˜bloodā€™ or ā€˜terrorā€™ or ā€˜promā€™ in it.

Dru of all the Blackthorns I want to befriend, they all have someone that can be considered their other half except for her and thatā€™s unacceptable because sheā€™s the best, THE BEST.

Livvy

ā€œBooks about computers and programming languages were stacked in careful rows by her bed.ā€

I thought of Kady from Illuminae right after I read that. Livvy is my girl I just wish we had more of her, I think she wouldā€™ve been my favorite.

Ty

ā€œOn the bedside table were his most beloved books: Arthur Conan Doyleā€™s Sherlock Holmes stories.ā€

I think Ty is a combination of me and my sister, and I canā€™t not love him. He and Livvy both have a half of my heart, they are both so precious.

ā€œLivvy, who knew better than anyone the anxiety that imprecise language could cause her brother, scrambled to her feet and went over to him. She put her arms around him, her chin against his shoulder. Ty leaned against her, his eyes half-lidded...ā€

The writing

The writing was beautiful, there are moments when I stopped reading and just closed my eyes and started dreaming. Thatā€™s not always the case though, I found that some parts of the book are better written than others.
That is not to say that it was bad, just some part like the prologue and such were more beautiful than others. Maybe this is just me and how I swoon over descriptive writing (if it doesnā€™t drag for long which it didnā€™t) I think what Iā€™m trying to say is the writing was okay with some beautiful moments

This is all I have, I'm actually tired šŸ˜‚ and this was embarrassing.

The End.
Lady Midnight (The Dark Artifices, #1) (2025)

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